Day 3 – What has been the driving force of my life?

What has been the driving force of my life?

As I pondered on this question – I recognise that my life has been at one time or the other been driven by things that don’t involve God. Ecclesiastes 4 vs. 4 – And I saw that all labour and all achievement spring from man’s envy of his neighbour.

Such things as:

· guilt - my past mistakes had been controlling my future in terms of manipulating me through my memories. I understood that when I sinned my guilt disconnected me from God’s presence and like Cain – I had been wandering through life without a purpose [Gen. 4 vs. 12 – when you work the ground it will no longer yield its crop for you. You will be a restless wanderer]. We are the products of our past, but we don’t have to be prisoners of it – God is renowned for giving people a new beginning, a fresh start. Psalm 32 vs. 1 – Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven whose sins are covered. Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit.

· resentment or anger; I needed to release those that have hurt me through forgiveness. Job 5 vs. 2 – resentment kills a fool and envy slays the simple – I am reminded here that by the simple act of me holding resentment I am foolish.

· Fear – That my fear regardless of its root will cause me to miss great opportunities. That it’s a self imposed prison that will keep me from becoming what God intends for me to be. 1 John 4 vs. 18 – There is no fear in Love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

· materialism; that my desire to acquire has become the whole goal of my life, which only provides temporary happiness – cause in the end I will always get bored with things and want newer ones. Reminding me that my value is not determined by my valuables – Because Real security can only be found in that which can never be taken from me which is my relationship with God.

· my need for approval – my being controlled by the opinions of others is a sure way to miss God’s purpose for my life. Jesus said in Matt 6 vs. 24 – no one ca serve two masters.. you cannot serve both God and Money.

So why is it important for me to know my purpose –

Knowing my purpose gives meaning to my life – without God life has no purpose, and without purpose life has no meaning. And without meaning life has no significance or hope. In the bible many expressed their despair - Isaiah 49 vs. 4 – I have laboured to no purpose, I have spent my strength in vain and for nothing; Yet what is due to me is in the Lord’s hand, and my reward is with God. Job 7 vs. 6 – my days are swifter than a weaver’s shuttle, and they come to an end without hope. Job 7 vs. 6 – I despise my life; I would not live forever let alone; my days have no meaning. For the greatest tragedy is not death but LIFE WITHOUT PURPOSE. But thankfully the plans that God has for me He knows, and He has declared it into being; plans to prosper me and not harm me, plans to give me a hope and a future – Jer. 29 vs. 11. Ephesians 3 vs. 20 – To him who is able to do immeasurably more than we ask of imagine, according to His power that is at work within us.

Knowing my purpose simplifies my life – Isaiah 26 vs. 3 – you will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast because he trusts in you. Knowing my purpose focuses my life – Philippians 3 vs. 13 - ..but one thing I do, forgetting what is behind and straining towards what is ahead. Ephesians 5 vs. 17 – therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s WILL is. Knowing my purpose motivates my life and prepares me for eternity. Because building an eternal legacy is what matters as living to create an earthly one is a short sighted goal. Romans 14 vs. 10, 12 – For we will all stand before God’s judgement seat;… so then, each of us will give an account of himself to God. John 14 vs. 6 – Jesus answered I am the way and the truth and the life – no one comes to the Father except though me.

Lessons Learnt on Day 3

Living on purpose is the path to peace for God will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast because he trusts in God. Previously my family and friends would have said guilt, resentment or anger, materialism and my need for approval were the driving forces for my life. But I am happy to report that it is no longer the case.

Day 2 - Does my Life Matter?

Does my Life Matter?

Why was I born? was it only to have trouble and sorrow, to end my life in disgrace (Jer. 20 vs. 18). This is the questions many ask themselves - and to be truthful I have also asked such questions. In order to answer these questions I must turn to the word of God. As I read His words I realised that Long before I was conceived by my parents, I was conceived in the mind of God. I was thought of - fate, chance, luck coincidence had nothing to do with it. That I am alive today because God wanted to create me. Isaiah 44 vs. 2 – This is what the Lord says – He who made you, who formed you in the womb and who will help you – Do not be afraid. Psalm 138 vs. 8 – The Lord will fulfill ‘His Purpose for me’; The Lord will perfect that which concerneth me

That He deliberately chose my race, the colour of my skin, my hair and every feature of my body. That I was custom made just the way He wanted me to be. Psalm 139 vs. 15 – My substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest part of the earth. Therefore, because God made me for a reason He chose when I will be born, what day, month year e.t.c. Psalm 139 vs. 16 – Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

God planned where I would live for His purpose. For His word tells me in Acts 17 vs. 26 – From one man He made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth, and He determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. Nothing in my life is random, its all for a purpose. Ephesians 1 vs.4 – For He chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight; In LOVE. And James 1 vs. 18 reminds us – He chose to give us birth through the word of truth that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all He created.

Isaiah 45 vs 18 – For this is what the Lord says – He who created the heavens, He is God; He who fashioned and made the earth; He founded it; He did not create it to be empty but formed it to be inhabited. The Lord created the world so I can live in it. And why did He do all this, Because God is Love – I John 4 vs. 8 – whoever does not love does not know God; Because God is Love. I am reminded that God made me in order to express His Love – Isaiah 46 vs. 3-4 – You whom I have upheld since you were conceived and have carried since your birth – Even to your old age and grey hairs I am He, I am He who will sustain you. I have made you and will carry you. I will sustain you and I will rescue you.

After studying these verses I finally realise that God made me for a reason and that my life has profound meaning. That when I make God the reference point of my life then I will discover the meaning and purpose of my life. Romans 12 vs.13 – Be Joyful in Hope, Patient in affliction and Faithful in prayer.

Lessons Learnt on Day 2

That I’m not an accident; I was in God’s care before I was born.

Day 1 - Inspiration, Illumination and Revelation

I have been wondering of what to do during this season and those that have been attending the TERC meeting have always heard me complain of my lack of understanding of my purpose.

My church back home in the UK has started 40 days spiritual significant time period and has chosen to study the book by Rick Warren – The Purpose Driven Life. I have had the book for a while (a present from my best friend in 2004) – but I’ve never managed to finish it as I always head straight to chapter one and try to finish the book all in one read. Obviously I get to chapter 12 stop and always find other things to get in my way of completing the book.

Of late – I’ve lacked motivation and my relationship with God appears to have done a downward spiral - in terms of me allowing my problems be more than a distraction. But I have decided that enough is enough.

I have chosen to believe that my DISTRACTION IS A CONFIRMATION OF MY SUCCESS. That the enemy is fighting dirty because he knows that I have an advantage over him because he knows I have Jesus – so he cant beat me or destroy me so he chose to try and distract me. Well I have news for you. It a’int working!!!. I will elaborate on a later date.

Today is Day 2/3 of my spiritual significant period and I have chosen to call this series – Inspiration, Illumination and Revelation. I will try to do a daily / weekly summary of what I believe God is using the book – especially with the help of the bible to teach me. I pray that it will also bless others and write to me if you’ve been blessed by the series. For His word says in 1 Timothy 2 vs. 7 – reflect on what God is saying, For the Lord will give you insight into all this -

Thank you Jesus.

Day 1 – It is not ABOUT ME

In the search for my purpose in life unbeknown to me I had started the search in the wrong place, position and with the wrong questions. I had asked selfish self centred questions like - what is it I want in life?, what is it I would like to do with my life?, where is it I want to be in life?, what are my goals?, my life’s ambition? and where do I see myself going?. There is nothing wrong with asking such questions but the questions needs to be directed to God. Because focusing on ourselves will never reveal our life’s purpose, unless we direct them to God – For His words says in the following verses -

Colossians 1 vs. 16 – “For by Him all things were created, things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible..”

Job 12 vs. 10 – In His hand is the Live of every creature – and the breath of all mankind

Romans 8 vs. 6 – The mind of a sinful man is death but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace

Matt 16 vs. 25 – For whoever wants to save his life will loose it, but whoever looses his life for me will find it

1 Corinth 2 vs. 7 – NO, we speak of God’s secret wisdom, a wisdom that has been hidden and that God destined for our glory before time began

Ephesians 1 vs. 11 – In Him we were chosen having been predestined according to the plan of Him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of His will.

God is definitely the source of my life – and I Must Turn to His word. I found that -

1. I can only discover my identity and purpose through a relationship with JESUS Christ

2. That His purpose for me predates my conception. That I may choose my career, my life partner, my house, my hobbies, my friends, But I don’t get to choose my purpose – cause without Him all the other stuff is meaningless

3. That the purpose of my life fits into a larger design of God.

Lesson Learnt

So as I pondered on what I have learnt I come to the realisation that – It really isn’t about me, but All about Him – that all things were created by Him for me and that Life is really about living for God and not for my self.

Day 2 to be continued before the end of the day – and Day three which is today will be posted up before tomorrow morning. I’m so loving this.

Warn her for me - very well!!!!!

Your mind can easily be weighed down if you do not take care not to dwell on situations for longer than a sec. pay attention that you don’t loose yourself in the care of the world. Because by making that situation a master over you – then the battle of your mind has already been lost. We need to remember that in all things that God is more than able. To open that door, to restore that which was lost, or to give you that peace that has no sorrow in it.

You remember her – don’t you all

“her” - The woman who never seems to be happy with How God had delivered, saved and blessed her. She had allowed herself to be ungrateful yet again. Had forgotten all that God did and was still doing for her, and because she was busy looking across the lanes that were occupied by others – she had begun to drift over – to the point where the spirit of heaviness had taken over her thought process. She had forgotten Psalm 37 vs. 7 and had disobeyed vs. 8.

I heard her say the other day_ two month but one ago -:

~ What is it that makes me happy? If life itself no longer makes me happy, how can I ever have an abundant life? ~

~ Each day I get a little withdrawn, ashamed of whom I’ve become. Life itself has lost its zest. I find my mind telling me you need to find a way out. But I have no more desire to look for a way out. Each day I become weaker than before, and the strength to move out of the pit continues to leave me ~.

~ What have I become? How have I gotten here? When did it get so bad? ~

~ Worries of life have begun to take over me and the thought of death no longer saddens me ~

~ They will be better off without me; Many times I've considered making a will. My desire to stay alive has been quenched ~ the only thing I look forward to now is when I’m called home ~

~ I have no more aspiration, and can no longer look forward into the future. What have I done to myself I exclaimed? ~

It is obvious that she has been drinking that mind destructing liquor, again – however she is loved, cause no sooner did the thought cross her mind – the Lord reminded her who she was in Christ Jesus – CHOSEN, HIS, BELOVED, SOUGHT AFTER, FRIEND, Great Woman, woman after God’s own heart, Friend of God..

Sometimes I Life of a stranger gets beleaguered trying to encourage this woman. Encouraging her is a full time job I tell ya. Imagine what the angels are saying in heaven concerning this young lady – that complains about life more than Job (and like Job her latter will be better than her former) – She’s just impatient that’s all. She has picked up Psalm 37 again – and the Lord has been using His word to help her through this process. Jaycee reminded me this morning of Romans 2 vs. 1 – this word has been a humbling experience for “her”.

For all the people in a struggle that think God has forgotten you, He hasn’t. Be encouraged. She is. I have also directed her to go read Jaycees blog – that young lady is anointed, or is it our loveliest Cherub and Miss D. She’s sending a shout out to all you ladies.

TERC really is awesome – come check it out when you have the time. The Spirit of the Lord moved this morning really it was an awesome bible study. Looking forward to Next week Friday’s meeting already – God willing I will be there.

Have a blessed weekend.

Drama in paradise.

So I’m not sure if I had mentioned that my mum is in the country. In fact she is in ATL visiting her elder sister. Now she has other sisters and brothers living around Georgia, but her younger sister has fallen out with her elder sister and brother. They have not spoken in years. The youngest one is very strong willed and can say a few strong words to you that could kill if you are not careful. Her elder sister has never been much of one to be involved in a fight – and doesn’t have the strength to argue with anyone.

Anyways the younger one had accused the elder one of doing many ghastly things to her – ok – and the brother had taken offence over her attitude towards them and her insults + insinuations. So now my mum is heavily involved – because she came to visit – and my mum is one of those that are ever ready to fight. Punches or whatever, she is able and ready - The strongest and fittest mum that I have ever known. She could still chase you around the house even now – and her slippers are still able to fly solo non-stop for longer than a few minutes.

Reports have been sent home to gran ma that I am a terrible daughter. Apparently I had said a few things about my mum’s growing up and they were not pleasant to say the least. My people Life of a stranger is in deep trouble. I have been accused of concocting stories and words have been sent home to gran ma about my behaviour. I have had to wake gran ma in the middle of the night to say I’m sorry for whatever it is I have done – I dare not call my aunt a lair – they might turn against me - biko mma eweliwe. My mum’s elder sister believes there is no smoke without fire – so I must have said something. My mama say na lie – they berra stay off her daughter before she deals with them….come and see drama. And the youngest is saying keep me out of it – I told you don’t get me involved.

Aunty what is it I was supposed to have said to you. Biko tell me. There was me having a seriously well deserved nap before making my way to my papers, before my mum called crying that her mama said that I had upset her. Kai. Luckily after speaking to gran ma – she told me not to worry – that she only wants to hear good news that all she asks is that the sisters live in peace. We spoke about other things then I said my good night. Mum returns to England over the weekend – she said she is really looking forward to going home. She don tire…

I’m glad my mum came – however I have found myself in the middle of warring sisters. Now I know how bijou felt back in the day. This is not a good place to be. I miss my fav aunties. All this sisters – why must they spoil things for us?/ or should I say me.

Why cant he let it go

Or should I say me [she said].

He loves me, he says. I think I know he does, he's made his intetions and his feelings glaringly clear to me. I think I love him too. Its so easy being with him, and talking to him - apart from his fake amerablam accent - Im not sure if he's lived in the US before - infact I know he hasn't - but I think I can go past the accent, and accept him for who he is.

I'm trying to be realistic. I need to make sure I love him for the correct reasons and not because of the way he makes me feel especially when I hear his voice. He still calls even after we'd said our goodbyes. He said he understood and have accepted, and yet he always makes me want to loose control of myself whenever I talk to him. I know its probably my flesh taking, but I should know better.

Darn it, why woun't he just let me go. It would have been alot easier to look forward to the future, but all this taking 10 steps backwards and two steps forward is taking its tool on me. I think Im tired now. My mind is made up and I remain resolute on my decision, but if only he could move on, I know I will be happy. I shan't tell as lie. His words of encouragement, and his remarkable insights into life's problems is very much needed, and just a word from him commands much respect. How can he be so good, but so wrong.

He needs to let her go. Its time she starts to look forward to what plans God has instore for her. I pray he can let it go, and then let her go.

Jabez

The following is an excerpt taken from the message sent to my email box weekly by the pastor of my church in England. And I felt to share it. I believe it will bless someone.

“ye have not, because ye ask not”. James 4.2

To bless means to give favour. Give pleasure. Bring happiness. Bring success. So the man who wants, like Jabez to, be more honourable than his brothers prays, Whatever You do, Lord, please bless me, and bless me a lot! Bless me significantly.

Jabez started, like Jacob, with many odds against him. From childhood, he was a prisoner of a curse of sorrow and pain. Yet what is most memorable about this man is not where He started or what he had to overcome, but where he ended up. Take a few moments to ask yourself what name you or others or circumstances have put on your life. Is your heritage or record stamped with labels like – Disappointment – Not very Smart – Unwanted – Rejection – Failure – Continuous Sickness / illness – Poverty – Servitude?

Your Heavenly Father’s name for you is not any of these; It is – CHOSEN (John 15.19 NIV) – MINE (Psa50.10-1) – BELOVED (Deut 33.12) – SOUGHT AFTER (Isa6212) – FRIEND (James 2.23) – Prosperous – Cedar – Mighty Man of Valour – Great Woman – Burning and shining light – Man after God’s own heart – Friend of God – etc.

Start praying the prayer of Jabez daily from today! Read it in 2 Chronicles 4.9,10. You may want to enlarge it and pray something like this for this week:

Dear Lord,

I want every single blessing that You would love to give me.

Forgive me for not desiring these enough to ask for them.

Please open Your heart, and be gracious to me. So let me experience You today,

In all of Your abundant loving kindness, even though I am in all of my unworthiness.

Touch my life in ways that are very personal so that I don’t miss Your fingerprints.

Bless me, Lord, I pray, bless me, significantly.

And I will praise You from whom all blessings flow.

In Jesus Name. Amen.

Hope your week has been good. I have been praying this prayer and I’m expecting something super to happen swiftly soon. Stay blessed all.

Too Fantastic – the story I mean

So when I was in my undergraduate years living in good old south London, I was working for this glazing company as a claims assessor. I loved the job, but hated getting up too early in the morning to get there. I had been working there for some of my university years, so when I decided to take a year out, out of education I continued working for them.

So most morning it was the habitual struggle of getting up and trying to get to work for 8am. Everyday I would be tempted to phone in sick, always thinking of what stories to tell, but alas no joy there.

And yet there was another like me. Every week something always seemed to happen to her that would cause her to take the day off. I was so sure she was making it up, but then again... One day she said she had woken up to a cordoned off road, cause a young boy had been stabbed right in front of her house and the police weren’t letting anyone out. She had to be questioned cause her room was directly opposite where the incident took place and she had to have seen it (yeah I don’t remember seing that on the news). Another day she said she had walked all the way to the local bus stop, and whilst she was standing in front of a huge puddle, the bus driver had driven his huge bus over the water puddle and had soaked her entire clothes in dirty water. So she had to walk all the way back home to change – [house was 20mins from bus stop]. Which she said was the reason why she came to work at 11.00am (yeah but she wasn’t a pedestrian – she had a nice car – hmm maybe car trouble??- I’ll let it go). Another day, she had gone to her car and found it missing. After a couple of hrs, had found it on a different street – (right!!! cause someone had stolen it). Another day she had dressed so stylishly to get to work, on her way there one heel had snapped off, and she had to go back all the way home to change her shoes (right – cause the shoe shop next to our office didn’t sell shoes in her size - right). Another day someone had tried to mug her, and she had fought them off, so she had to spend the morning at the police station. But she didn’t come back with a police report number. Just thinking of her stories made me cringe with envy, always thinking “how does she do it, how does she get away with it – people like me also found it hard to get to work – but I’m here.

Imagine the extent many would go just to get away from work. I even heard that there were some silly people over here that would phone in sick at work and go on television shows, come on, that’s just jokes.

Has anyone ever encountered one of them??!!!!!!!..

Oh by the way - I was sent this video, thought it was interesting - Who said white men can't dance? - They can!!!!



Thanks Diamond for all the help.

From Osi with Love - MINE

I have recently acquired a new friend. I’m truly excited. Except that he lives in England (that’s not so bad) and his phone bill is sky rocketing (this is bad). He truly is a magnificent and wonderful fellow and I’m glad that the Lord sent him my way. He really is quite refreshing, funny, witty and without a doubt sweet. Our outlook on life and the daily struggles of trying to find our purpose was something we scarily had in common. And we’ve decided to encourage each other along. He is very much single, so at least we can be single together (at least for the next 6months – but nothing is guaranteed – right!! He sent me one of the many articles he’s written (oh did I forget to mention that he is also a poet). After reading many of his fine work, I pleaded with him to let me post this one. He has. From Osi with Love - Mine

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Every once in a while my heart wanders to times long gone. Memories sweet and bitter, dreams long abandoned and forgotten back to hunt me. There is a conflict between faded fantasies and new aspirations. The feeling is hard to explain, impossible to place as good or bad. I feel trapped yet free, my heart feels heavy but light. I feel wrapped in a seamless cloud of joy and sadness.

My heart wanders. The one thing on my mind is the beauty and innocence of childhood, the perfect and pure smile of a toddler, his wrinkle free face that neither feels nor understands the pain of this world. Without fear of the days to come, with complete trust he staggers as he explores the world. His world is pure and without selfish motives. No Matter how many times he stumbles he is up again. Failure never holds him back; he knows nothing about selfish motives. Without pride or shame he cries with all his heart. With the same energy he laughs as he rolls in the dust.

How I miss those days. Times when my youthful mind was pure. Back then I was in a hurry to get out of bed because there was work to be done. There was a world to touch. The 14 year old boy could give his whole heart to a course he believed in. Now my mind is dragged away by so many things. The alarm clocks don’t get me out of bed any more. It only tells me how many more hours I can give to sleep. I look in the mirror and I am shocked at the man I have become. The receding hair line and the extra wrinkles I can stand, but the drifted heart tears me apart. How did it come to this? Where did I fail? How have I failed?

Once again I find it hard to get on my feet, so I remain on my knees and ask for help. I know He has not given up on me. He never gives up on us. Time slips but I must hold on. I must fight to keep the dreams of my youth alive. To live life to the full, to experience the reason I am and return to my essence.

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My Brother the Protection Commotion master!!

Good morning Blogpals. My people Ndewo nu.

It feels like I’ve been away for ever but that’s not true. It’s the beginning of the year, and one needs to write their vision statement down and make it known for what it is they are expecting from God this 2007.

As many of you know I went home for the Christmas and New Year break. I was sort of tired of my cooking, and I wanted to go and really be pampered and feast on my mum’s food. She’s one of those that will keep you awake all night chatting and eating at the same time. You end up having 4 meals a day, plus plenty of snacks in between. And later on she will be the first to tell you, “your fine figure has stared to take a turn for the worse. You know you are a beautiful girl and you need to loose some weight – only a little will do”. So to say when I was growing up in my parent’s home, my weight always fluctuated, and would loose weight when I was away from home. Her food was too good not to eat. It was simply belisimo!!!

It was fun catching up with all my sisters and brothers and to hear that my baby brother – let’s call him ebere – was running a protection commotion at school. Yep you heard it correctly.

Let us start from the beginning. Our neighbourhood is an all white neighbourhood and ebere has always been very tall for his age. Year 7 boys in my high school (which is first year of secondary school) always had their own lavatory room, so that they don’t get bullied by older boys, and they would always have teachers and 6^th form prefects monitoring their toilets. When ebere was in year 7, he was never allowed in these toilets unless he had his school book showing his name his year and his form teacher, a form of Id for him, and sometimes he would cry (bless him). All his class mates were significantly shorter than him and the prefects and teachers would never believe ebere was a year 7 student. This carried on throughout year 7.

When they moved to year 8, they were now prime targets to be bullied by older boys, so his friends had a meeting with other boys from the same year and they agreed to ask ebere not only to be their friend but to also protect them. They told him that they would each pay him £2 each day for the honour of standing next to him. Imagine!!! Ebere agreed, he didn’t really care. Every day boys from all over the year would come and pay him money just so that they would hang out with him. The other older boys never came round them whenever they were with ebere, cause not only did he sound like a man, he was built like one too.

My sweet brother would run home every day and give my mum his change to hold for him. Ebere has always had money. I sometimes send him money weekly to charge his cell phone and he has 3 other older sister to give him money apart from me, so my mum never really thought anything of it, because she was ebere savings manager, and at the end of the month, they would go to the bank together and deposit it. So on the second day, my mum felt that the money he was exchanging with her was a little more than normal and felt to ask ebere where the sudden increase in funds was coming from. He subsequently relayed the whole story about how all the boys in his year came to him for protection. After the third day, the sweet boy he was, told them not to pay him anymore for protection and that he would protect them for free. He felt sorry for them and allowed them to hang out with him if they wanted (Imagine – If that was me, I would have made some serious money out of this venture – but that wasn’t his style).

I also think there’s more to the story. Ebere is the only student in his school to have scored top marks consecutively in the years he has been in that school. The school sends out postcards at the end of each semester informing us that he is the top scorer in all of his subjects and that they would like to congratulate him yet again. So I feel that they probably hang out with him to see if there was something they could learn from him (maybe not all of them, but at least some). We as a family have been blessed by him. Not only is he a blessing to his friends and all that know him he is also a delightful and generous Youngman. I think He also gave them back their money (Silly boy!!). He is still growing and acquiring more friends by the day. He is well respected – Imagine that from a young boy.

Your Words for 2007

Greetings all, I would like to apologies to all for my inability to update my blog and do my blog rounds. To say I have been under house arrest in the comforts of my parent’s home is definitely an understatement. I loved every moment of it. And God was right in saying it is not good for life of a stranger to be alone – LOL. This break was much needed and both spiritually and physically refreshing. There is no place like home. I am now back in Virginia (arrived very late last night – and was eager to get back to my experiments – so to say I am now at work).

Before I continue, I felt that seeing as this is my very first post this 2007, it makes sense to start of with words to encourage you this new year. So that at the end of the new year, when you take a stock list - you will know that the Lord Had been good to you this 2007, and that His sweet words did not return to Him empty, and that He is faithful.

You are Destined to Triumph because there shall be a fulfillment of God’s words to you.
In 2007, you are destined to triumph. You are not heading toward defeat, you do not have an appointment with failure and you are not being set up for a disappointment. It does not matter what the natural projections or extrapolations or statistics say about your circumstances. You are heading towards victory. Its waiting for you, it’s been prophesied, foretold and prearranged. In this new year listen to what God is saying to you: Isa 54.4 "Do not be afraid; you will not suffer shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated.

Yes I know you have prayed and waited and desired for, and held on to the prophetic words that have been spoken over your life and it looks like your hands are growing weary of holding, whilst the enemy is also busy, tirelessly painting the picture of hopelessness, and you have been reminding God of how old you are and how the time is passing. Nevertheless, take courage. I declare to you that Seven is a number of divine perfection, and God shall perfect that which concerneth you. This year more than ever before, there shall be a performance of that which He spoke into your life. Listen:"Therefore say to them, ‘This is what the Sovereign LORD says: None of my words will be delayed any longer; whatever I say will be fulfilled, declares the Sovereign LORD.’" Eze 12:28.

For whereas you have said "The LORD has forsaken me, the Lord has forgotten me." Isa 49.14 - This is The Lord’s response to you as you move on into 2007: "Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me. Isa 49.15,16 Hence with confidence proceed into 2007 with the faith of Abraham who -
Who against hope believed in hope, that he might become the father of many nations, according to that which was spoken, So shall thy seed be. And being not weak in faith, he considered not his own body now dead, when he was about an hundred years old, neither yet the deadness of Sara’s womb: He staggered not at the promise of God through unbelief; but was strong in faith, giving glory to God; And being fully persuaded that, what he had promised, he was able also to perform. Rom. 4.18-21.

Do not consider the limitations of your human capabilities neither the enormity of the task ahead of you. Do not let the height of the mountain you have to climb daunt you. God is not asking you to do it in YOUR own strength. He asks you to be strong IN THE LORD!

Your need (what you need) to accomplish what you see in front of you this year will not be dependent on, or supplied by the strength of your bank account or your own riches. They can only be and will be supplied according to HIS RICHES IN GLORY, IN CHRIST JESUS! (Phil 4.13) Now, that is exciting. And if you feel overwhelmed by what is ahead, with the enemy parading your goliath before you perpetually to intimidate you, (For forty days the Philistine came forward every morning and evening and took his stand. 1Sam 17.16) Remember that:“the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill … Ec 9:11.

No king is saved by the size of his army; no warrior escapes by his great strength. A horse is a vain hope for deliverance; despite all its great strength it cannot save. But the eyes of the LORD are on those who fear him, on those whose hope is in his unfailing love, to deliver them from death and keep them alive in famine. Ps 33.16-19

At other times you may look at those who have “made it” both in and out of The Kingdom and you feel inferior because you do not have their administrative skills, neither their business acumen nor their leadership strategies etc. Let me assure you. I agree with God that “It was not by their sword that they won the land, nor did their arm bring them victory; it was God’s right hand, God’s arm, and the light of God’s face, for God loved them. Ps 44.3 - What God has done for them He wants to do for you! He is no respecter of persons.

In closing what I believe God is saying to you to carry you through this glorious New Year, is to listen to these sweet words from The Lord: Behold, … saith the LORD, … I will perform that good thing which I have promised unto the house of Israel and to the house of Judah. Jer 33:14.

Personalise it; memorise it, and say it constantly, declaring it to your spirit “Behold in this year 2007, … The LORD will perform that good thing which He has promised unto me” Hence I can say with confidence to you: “Blessed (are YOU) that believed: for there shall be a performance of those things which were told (YOU) from the Lord. (Lu 1:45).

So what Have I been up to – Will update on a later date. Stay blessed all. And a Blessed new year to you all. I am well.

I don’t want to have a criminal record

I would like to send my warm wishes to everyone by wishing them a merry Christmas and may 2007 usher in the blessings of the Lord in buckets for you all. Amen.

I was going to put up something inspirational for this time of year, and as I did my blog rounds and after reading belle's blog, I remembered what my youngest sister, who happens to be a lawyer now (but was in law school then – when this all happened) did a while back during this season.

I normally book my family flights to Nigeria, but this year (2003) I left it in the hands of my then boyfriend/fiancé to do. He had booked them in a group to get discounts and was given an upgrade by the travel agency but they failed to tell him that we all had to pay an extra £50 for each upgrade (or he sort of forgot). This was pretty good for flying top class. We were also travelling in groups and on different days. So after we all went to Nigeria, and had a wonderful time – on our way back my family (mum, youngest brother and two younger sisters) were stranded at the airport. When they went to check in their bags, they couldn’t check them in and was told they had to go see the ticketing supervisor. It was a chaotic time of the year, and so they took forever to see them, and by the time they saw them, they refused to let them recheck their bags and told them that the gates were closing. To cut the long story short, they had missed their flights, were put on the waiting list, and could not leave for up to a week. They kept ferrying them from one city to another trying to get them boarded but whenever they got to the different airports the seats would always miraculously disappear. So finally, Virgin Atlantic had spaces for two, my sisters went on it, and my mum gave them her luggages, - 4 in total – and one packed full with her goodies (dry fish, meat – all kinds of cookery stuff).

When my lawyer sister arrived at Gatwick airport – she went straight to the “something to declare aisle” opened my mum’s goodies suitcase and said she had something to declare. She took them out one by one, said her mum gave them to her and was stranded at the airport. The one with her who was only a few years older than her, was gob smacked; she couldn’t say anything (a med student – who also didn’t want to loose her license before she got them).

My mum who after the whole episode was looking forward to consoling herself with her smuggled goods asked her beloved daughters, where her food stuff were, my girls said – “I declared it all because I didn’t want to have a criminal record”. My mum nearly lost it. Only they would think customs officers reported such incidence to the police and criminal records could be obtained from such actions. That’s my family for you.

Please don’t even get me started on my two older brothers and immediate younger sister. They are so principled it’s beyond a joke. Let’s just say my mum has been doing her smuggling herself. At least it will be her criminal record…

On that note I would like to wish you all a blessed time with all your families, I pray that the Lord will grant you all journey mercies as you all travel – both in your going out and coming in, and may His light be ever before you.

Merry Christmas and a very Happy new year.

I'm secretly jealous - that has to be the only explanation!!!

For all those who would like to know what’s happening with my pastor friend – We’ve (I've) decide to stay just friends. No matter how hard I prayed I never could see a light at the end of the tunnel. My mother also confirmed the lack of the yes answer. After getting used to the idea and prayer agreement with the saints (in my church here), my pastor friend was able to walk away knowing in heart it is well. He was the man I had asked for, down to every specification on my list (except for the heart surgeon – which I probably will not have LOL) – but I’m learning that not everything that looks feels and meets good is right for me. For some reason it wasn’t him or if it were this is not the time. What can I say – I have let my lover go. The Lover of my soul still remains though. We are still tight as ever.

The title of this post is there for a reason. For those of you who have been following my blog will understand my latest predicament. My young guy friends are all married (imagine) who said men as young as 25 don’t know the meaning of the word commitment. My guys do. So I have this last friend that is still single. He wants to retire at the age of 40 so has been working very hard with his business his work and his forum. He is very good at what he does. I was sort of happy cause we could be single together and so seeing as he’s more focused on his work, the love bug might not be hitting him anytime soon.

So back in the day I had this girlfriends – I call them my Liverpool crew (they were all from Liverpool – myself from Chester – I’ve had so many crew – its becoming ridiculous) – we loved our crew cause it was made up of 10 girls all Igbo (bar one) – and every where we went people took notice. We felt beautiful – we were beautiful (I wont tell a lie) – LOL – and after my undergraduate years I moved cites, back up north of England to do my doctorate. We always kept in contact with each other, whenever people would have a house or club party they always invited us – the crew – never one person – all of us – one of us ended up being a hip hop artist (I’m sure after this I will no longer be anonymous). So that was also one of the things that kept us tight.

So there was this girlfriend of mine from the crew (lets call her JC) – I knew her from my main friend PB – who is now an up and coming hip hop artist (and is now saved – praise the LORD). One fine Saturday morning in the month of august, as I was conversing with my last single guy friend (lets call him Bdady) – I had this feeling that I wanted to call and speak to JC to see how she was – so as I was trying to get off the phone, Bdady said he could call her for me that I don’t have to spend my money and we could have a two way conversation (so knowing the cheapskate that I was) – I agreed. We called JC we spoke for a while, I introduced her to my brother Bdady and that was it. He said she came across as rude. I mean who cares; I wasn’t trying to do a link. So Bdady wakes up one Monday morning in the month of December, finds this number on his list of international calls – thought what the goodness and called the number to find who this number belonged to. My JC answered, they started sending emails and she tells him she’s coming to New York the following Monday. So my Bdady calls me all excited (this is not like him) – so he tells me the following week my JC was in New York – erm ok she didn’t call to tell me. No problem. They were supposed to be linking up this weekend – both Friday and Saturday – but he calls me to tell me he’s on his way to meet her mid week. What the goodness – What is happening!!! – what happened to being single TOGETHER – So he meets her, I spoke to JC – aah the voice of my good friend – we still caught joke – I guess it was all the travelling and the busy schedule that’s why she hasn’t called. Whichever, she sounded well. So I called Bdady very late in the evening – boy where are you? Don’t you know you need to be driving home, you have a long drive ahead of you and you have to be at work very early in the morning? He’s still there, having fun – laughing with his teeth wide open. I went to bed. As I lay on my bed, I wondered why I shouldn’t be happy that my Bdady is having a good time with my JC. It dawned on me, that maybe because I really might just be the last single left – even in my Liverpool crowd and misery loves company. I just might not have any more brothers to speak with, cause I’m quickly running out of single friends, and don’t want to be that single friend that is friends with the married folks. So I’m secretly jealous – that has to be the only explanation, why else? - Because all that money he was going to spend on our outing together when I hit New York will have to be spent on another. Oh well. It looks like our single together days might just be over. Adieu bro, adieu Bdady – that elusive love he never had time for might just hit him without realisation. JC is a good person and so is Bdady. They do look good together if I must say so myself. I just wished I had more time with our single together days.

Re – digging Her Well

Don’t you find when you feel that you’ve been blessed, there seem to be problem looming. People trying to take your joy away on a mission known as “undercover joy burst”.

She has come so far. You should have seen her back when it all started.

In spite of all that was going on in her personal life, the Lord had blessed her indeed. But now it appears difficulties, that was about to accumulate to a nervous breakdown seems to be knocking on her door. People has started to cover up, what she had done, had quarrelled and opposed her in every opportunity possible, and now she was facing ruin. Each time she faced a difficulty she attributed it to her past mistakes and maybe she didn’t deserve to be happy. She didn’t realise that all she needed was to re-dig her “well” this last time. She needed to remember that the first time she asked God to forgive her of her past He did and He said He would remember them no more (Isa. 38 vs. 17; Isa 43 vs. 25). The Lord Jesus was shamed as he lay on that cross so her guilt and shame had been removed (Isa. 25 vs. 8), the plans her enemies had for her was not going to succeed (Isa. 19 vs. 3). He wanted her to draw closer to Him, push and pray harder than she had ever done, for her breakthrough was but moments away. He wanted to bless her just as He did Isaac when he encountered oppositions (Gen. 26 vs.12 -25). Just as Isaac dug another well, No one quarrelled with him anymore and the Lord gave him room to flourish in the land. Finally the guilt scales that had blinded her eyes were lifted. She dug and pushed one last time and no one quarrelled with her anymore. She was finally settled by God in every area of her life. She now has a family and a very good job with room to flourish. She had atlast found happiness, happiness she never felt worthy of. But alas she was happy. The other forms of happiness she sort had sorrow in it, but the one the Lord had given her had no sorrow (Prov. 10 vs. 22; Isa. 60 vs. 20; John 16 vs. 22)

What is holding you back? Don’t let the guilt of the past have an impact on your future. It did in this case, but the Lord said NO. She didn’t deserve God’s grace, but He still forgave her and blessed her. I also need to re-dig my wells – I think you all need an update on my pastor friend. I will post on it the next time. Stay blessed all.

How would you feel?

I knew a young woman once. She was jolly, easily excitable, always with a terribly huge smile on her face and worked tirelessly for the Lord. She was a woman with a strong Faith in the Lord, but she also had some difficult days. She tried her best to put maximum effort into whatever she did and the Lord blessed her effort regardless.

I knew a young woman once. She was a graduate student – of colour – and very naïve. She only read about isms in books and watched it on the television but she never believed it was something that was inherently working even in today’s world.

I knew a young woman once. She was forced to collaborate with a young vibrant – fellow graduate student – she was sweet, nice, stunningly beautiful, blonde and of German decent. The woman of colour was forced to share her ideas, results – her work – with this young vibrant lady under the pretence of collaboration – team work – Pushing the frontiers of science forward. The young woman of colour did all the work, generated all the results and because the vibrant lady could not match up to the woman of colour the Departmental heads always felt sorry for her. Whatever the woman of colour produced – she was forced to share with her vibrant team member. The Young woman of colour realised that her work was constantly attributed to this vibrant young woman and decided to create a niche for herself. She came up with an idea, ran it past the departmental heads and got the approval to proceed. She was told the next day that her idea would work better if a departmental head put it together – with the guarantee that she would be in charge of the work. When the time to give the woman of colour what was hers it was given to the vibrant young woman with a nice sweet smile.

I knew a young woman once. Not knowing what next to do she cried and became desperate. She was going to take any type of position – and began to believe she had no self worth. There was no way out, and no future. She was told she had no vision and academia was not a place for her. She believed the FACT and had forgotten the TRUTH. She still carried on her work in the Lord but daily you could see she was subdued. Even though she was of good cheer that deceptive deep sadness was very visible on her face. One day she said to herself “I must enquire of the Lord and know for myself where I went wrong”. As she looked out of her window and saw the rain drops watering the plants – she remembered the word of the Lord for her – “As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth” Isa 55 vs. 10 – 11 – “For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay” Hab. 2 vs. 3 – She smiled a little. Her strength renewed and more persuaded now than ever that her GOD will never leave her. For He is making everything new; He is trustworthy and true; For He said to her I have brought you this far and is taking care of your affairs – “It is done”. “He who overcomes will inherit all – He will be their God and he will be His son” – Rev. 21 vs. 5 – 7.

I knew a young woman once. For if she hadn’t had the love of God on her side – She probably would have been dead now. The worries of life would have snuffed out her young life. So even though they had stripped her of all she had worked so hard for they did not realise that God had a different plan for her. In the end she was awarded an important position in the department with funds to do as she pleased. She had become an overcomer. The young vibrant woman is doing well too. Let us hope for better things for her.

Dedicated to all the young ladies / gentlemen ever short changed because of a reason or the other – The Lord has better plans for you. You didn’t get it does not mean you’re not good enough. It simply means it’s not for you.

Nwan my Love - sorry she played you!!

My good friend (& cousin - 6 times removed) just called me today - I haven't spoken to him in a while. The last time we spoke he was getting married and he had prayed concerning her and had peace of mind concerning her. He had asked her to marry him; she had agreed but was reluctant to fix a date. You see she was young, I'm told 23 and he was 36 yrs - Yes 36 - even the age difference shocked me. He loved her very much and she appeared to as well - but she was hesitant.

Why shouldn't she be hesitant - according to Miguel's "The games women play" he might have been a "fry pan" or a "grill" guy. He was successful and financially stable - And he wasn't going anywhere and she got whatever she wanted from him. A man that could be relied upon, a man with upstanding morals - but the reasons why the relationship should not work was glaring!!

He was devastated - He was hoping for a December traditional marriage but she was now leaving - She had toyed and left - she had got close to his mother and finally came out with it. "Our relationship will not work" she said - "I am catholic and he's protestant - the age difference is very much - we have nothing to talk about and we are not on the same level - He's too old for me and more mature than I am - I need to find me someone with a smaller age difference and interest".

Baby girl - didn't you know all this while you were dating? Didn't you know all this when you were spending his money?, hounding him day and night, telling him how much you love him and can't live without him?, sweet pea, didn't you realise this when your sisters and family friends told you at the beginning concerning the lack of common ground? - Why did you have to pull him in only to break this good man - who has always been on the good guy’s side. Can a woman ever tell of how he has hurt tricked and abused them? If there is one please say it loud!!

He has always been family orientated - worked to get his family off the ground - always too busy for himself but available for others - This was the one thing he wanted - you should have told him from the beginning. There is nothing wrong with what you did baby girl (breaking off the engagement), but it was the way you did it and the person you did it to.

It was not meant to be, but in the future don't play this game. You knew it would never work cause the reasons you outlined was always there from the beginning - you should have told him what you wanted him for and not used him to get what you wanted - only to dash him when you realised how serious he was. Baby girl you are far too young to play these games - If ever in doubt - Then stop - don't pretend!!

I hear another is about to take your place - I hope he will take his time - and not rush into bad rubbish.

Disclaimer – it makes you think – just because you have peace about someone you intend to propose to does not make them the right one. Sometimes it so obvious that that person is playing games!!

UPDATE -

I forgot to mention that Nwan my love is now married to the "Best Woman" in the world.. I love that girl mannnn, she is something else. He got married Jan 2007..... God is Faithfull my people.

Where is My MAN?!!!!!!

I had and still have a good friend whose sister was 6 years older than we were. We were in our late teens and we always wondered why she was still single. I always liked staying over at her sister’s place – she was always fun to be with – but all she ever talked about was men, relationships and men. We didn’t quite understand her, we always thought to ourselves – how can it be so difficult to find a man, when there were so many handsome men – Just strolling down the street – there were men galore – or is the dudes in the clubs – F- I- N- E. We always visualised ourselves by the age of 25 –married and settled and done everything we needed to have done – and the age we were then to be fun time age. We always had this look on our face that said her sister worried too much. Some years after that – I went to stay at her sisters place yet again – she was still doing the same talk routine. Men – relationships – men. She was slightly on the heavy side – and so we assumed that could be the reason why she was still not married at her age. As a last result – she started going to this Pentecostal church in North London – and left after many months – apparently the pastor had had an affair and appropriated some church fund. She was still searching for her Mr Right but she was now doing it in all the wrong places. At that time, I really never understood why she was still single – and why she was finding it difficult to find a man.

As the years progressed, so did my age, and I found myself again in the position I once found difficult to understand when I was a tad younger than I am now. Was in my mid twenties and very much single. As I looked around me – in my circle of friends – I found that they were all married / or were in a lasting relationship – All working for the Lord and enjoying the presence of their companion as they embraced the work of the Lord. I wasn’t sure if I was finding it difficult to accept – or was it the fact that it was always brought to my attention – but it appeared that I was always asked about it. Causing me to feel - when previously the thoughts had never crossed my mind. It got to a point the meetings I had with my pastors increased – I was having more regular meetings with my pastor than I would have expected. The topic – how are you feeling? Or how do you feel when you hear that J, T, K, Di, E, Da, and countless others were getting married – my answer would always remain I am very happy for them – and the Will of God is being realised in their life. For some of them – I had to pray with them and for them - for God to reveal and confirm to them that their partner was their partner – so I was very much present during the entire process of the courtship – Especially there during their highs and their lows – and I guess it was probably why the pastors insisted on seeing me on a more regular basis – concerning my relationships – or lack of it – It had to effect me in one way or the other – psychologically or emotionally. I was ripe to be categorised as a woman who might be if not desperate to settle down – I had many opportunities to feel sorry for myself. My mum who had been a lobbyist of the idea of me marrying at the age her sisters got married (30 yrs and above) – started her fasting and praying routine when it dawned on her that her daughter in her circle of friends was the only single left – She stepped up – changed her entire strategy – and was now lobbying must marry in mid to late twenties -

But I’m glad that even though some days might be difficult – The Word of the Lord says in Isaiah 34 vs. 16 -17 – “None of these will be missing, not one will lack her mate. For it is his mouth that has given the order, and his Spirit will gather them together. 17. He allots their portions; His hand distributes them by measure. They will possess it forever. And in Numbers 23 vs. 19 – He reassures us that He does not lie – and as He planned it so will it be and as He purposed it so will it stand [Isa 14 vs. 24; Isa 46 vs. 11; Isa 45 vs. 23; Jer 4 vs. 28 [end]; Jer 29 vs. 11], That He has not forgotten us – Isa 49 vs. 15-16 , that I will never be disappointed in Him [vs. 23 end], because the words that go out of His mouth concerning me/ us will not return to Him empty []Isa 54 vs. 11].

What do I mean by difficult – recalling and recanting the past – wondering why I had to go through what I had to go through – emotionally – men of no valour – His words tells me to forget what had happened in my past – and look forward to what He is doing, asking me if I still don’t see it [Isa 43 vs. 18-19] – that I had to go through what I went through cause He is teaching me what is best for me [Isa 48 vs. 17] – and He disciplines me because of His Love for me [Heb 12 vs. 6-7]. I am not saying that He is to be blamed for my mistakes or “wayo” men coming my way LOL – but I am saying that even in that He was and still is in control.

So even though – many would come to me and wonder why I’m still single – saying is it because she has read too much that she thinks she’s too good for our men, or she’s single because no man is good enough – my consolation is that the word of God tells me that I should not fear the reproach of men or be terrified by their insults []Isa 51 vs7], and because He helps me I will not fear disgrace [Isa 50 vs. 7; Isa 54 vs. 4]. His time is the best time. It is better to wait and have what He has given to you, than to rush to take what He has not given to you. So celebrate your age. God only knows how to give good things – He can’t give bad things – so those days when you cry yourself to sleep – feeling sorry for yourself – think about how you are wasting useful tears that you could use when the time to rejoice arrives – because yes days might be hard – but as long as there is noon time and harvest time, as long as My God is on The Throne – what He has promised He will bring to pass – Yes it might seem too long – and yes you might ask the question why you and what makes you different from the others – The difference is YOU – you have been made differently – and Your portion is different – Remember He has caused your boundary line to fall on pleasant places for YOU and your lot already secure [Psalm 16 vs. 5-6]. So break up unploughed ground – Your season to be blessed has arrived. And the Lord has remembered you.

Its a interesting World!!

I had decided to put a very interesting perspective on life thus far – but I just couldn’t let this be. As I pondered on how to seek the answer to my question without it being an allegory, I finally decided that I needed help.

You might find this funny – I know I do!

I am a Nigerian as far as I’m concerned – I might not be a typical Nigerian who spent a lot of her grown up years in Nigeria but I have tried to make up for my inadequacies – I travel back to Nigeria annually – when I’m there I’ve tried to learn the local dialects so that I am not taken advantage of – tried to learn some Yoruba – It always comes in very useful – I’m not saying am an expert but I can get by - I can understand and speak Igbo – I’ve also started learning the pidgin English – I try to hang out more in the village – no point in staying in the cities [cause its all a learning experience] – Apart from the lack of electricity, bad road, running water, mosquito bites, police thieves, some wazup men – I believe I have slowly assimilated myself back to the system.

I also have a Nigerian passport. My father made sure he got us all one. Our Nigerian passports must have expired the first time I remember in the early or mid 90’s. My dad always had our Nigerian passports – So he never got round to renewing them – So in 2001 he decided to travel to Nigeria on a leave to stay for a year or more – and he remembered he had to renew our passport – We all had to go to the Nigerian embassy in London – I have never seen a place so disorganised in my entire life. We had got all the forms signed, every requirement met – but they refused to renew our passport – They made up one story or the other – I nearly lost my rag that day. So Finally my dad asked to see the guy in charge of the embassy – They had my dad waiting for hrs – my dad was cool and collected – I was looking for someone to run my mouth to – so finally he met the man – whom realised he knew my dad – they struck off a conversation – and within hrs all our passports were renewed.

My executive self have been asked to be chief-bridesmaid at my dear friend and cousin’s wedding – My passport expired august of this year – I really don’t want to have to go through everything that we went through just to get one passport – so I thought I should go get a visa – A friend adanna had applied for a Nigerian visa - even though she spent her entire secondary school terms in Nigeria – her visa application was denied – You can blatantly tell she’s Nigeria, she talks Nigerian, has a Nigerian name, but they declined her visa to go to Nigeria.

So what I’m I getting at – It looks like a Nigerian like me will have to apply for visa to go to Nigeria. They’ve asked I should bring invitation letter from Nigeria to show I will not go to Nigeria disappear, and not want to return – to show I have sufficient funds to stay in Nigeria and will not be a burden to Nigeria -

What if I choose to renew my passport – I need to get thumb print – do they still do that – and get someone in official government to watch me sign. My dad had always dealt with that side of things – but its time I try and deal with this myself. So this is where you guys come in. Please my blog friend – I need your advice – ibi like say – I no go return to Nigeria again o. My trip is planned for mid January – any chance any of this immigration issues be resolved before then?

Is she really out of her mind!!!

I'm about to tell you a story - A story that requires wisdom in order to advice appropriately -

Lets suppose a woman meets and falls in love with a good man, a godly man, who as far as he’s concerned has found his favour and is about to obtain favour from the Lord for doing so. He loves, adores and cherishes her - her happiness is his ultimate ambition and one of her things about him - is she loves the way he loves her - But here is the catch.

He is very successful, and even though he’s a transatlantic kinda guy, he lives and has his base in Nigeria. His business is in its infancy, and only requires a few more years to reach its full potential, where possibly another branch could be opened outside of nigeria. He does have an intention to live outside Nigeria and have given the woman an option of choosing where she would like them to settle, so that they can discuss and choose a likely outcome. He wants them to have a relationship where they are together and her career is not affected.

Now the woman is very successful at what she does, is world renowned (scientist – in her field – the youngest black and only black individual in her field) – People have always tagged her to be one of the Nobel Lauriets for example of the future – is published in prestigious journals and is about to be employed as an associate professor on a tenure track post. Her ideas are ground breaking and her fellow scientists look out for her work to see what journals her papers appears to find out if she is slacking or on track.

She is also a mighty woman of God – A woman who knows and understands her role as a support to her husband and help mate. She has modelled herself on the wife of a noble character told in Proverbs 31 vs. 10 and has always believed that her husband will be her master as Sarah called her husband Abraham master – she believes her role as a wife is beside her husband and would not be separated from her husband for any length of time - she sees her position and achievements as blessings not as a result of her intelligence, she has never been career orientated and therefore has always held everything she has lightly. Her parents are very proud of her, especially her mother, who goes about and speaks to total strangers about her beloved daughter. She is 26, and her mother is not just about to let her go, because not only is she her mother’s daughter but her best friend too. Her mother would like her married (some day – what mother wouldn’t) – but not just yet – she is not mentally prepared to let her go. She is the eldest daughter of a large family unit – and her family love and adore her – she is not just a sibling to them – but she is a blessing to them – She is a deacon in her church – a woman very respected by her pastors and by the entire congregation - she is involved in every church department – and because she devotes her time to God – God devotes His time to her – To sum it up she is a woman of favour.

Now she is in-love with this man – she is in the process of finding if he is her master and lord. She would also love her mother and siblings and her pastors to agree on this and believes that when the time comes they will all agree – but it appears that the process is taking longer to resolve. When she makes her decision she would want to move to Nigeria to be with him (her husband – instead of waiting for the business to mature - that may take some time) – she would also have to have a career change – you see her field is very new even in the western world and is only gathering pace there – She would be seen as a wasted talent if she does move – but IS HE WORTH IT?? –

The time is almost here, she is about to make a decision – a decision no one wants to hear – Is she out of her mind?? –