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You can never grow as a person or in your faith unless you have gone through a storm / storms and realize that it was through GOD's grace and His mercy that He brought us through। And since nothing in our life just happens, and because God is the author of our life, He has already written every chapter concerning us from the beginning even to the very end. Therefore, since there is no love greater than the Love of GOD's, let us never forget that our life can only grow better under His direction.

So how fortunate that He gave him this word today again reminding us of that fact “What if he did this to make the riches of his glory known to the objects of his mercy, whom he prepared in advance for glory” – Romans 9:23. That what you and I have gone through or may be going through was and is for a greater purpose. Because it is entirely up to God to do as He pleases with us - ¹⁵Don't I have the right to do what I want with my own money? – Matthew 20:1-16. And because of what He has shown us, we ought to rejoice that He has chosen “us” to be objects of His mercy.

What you are going through will not be easy and may never get easy, but it is worth the goal in front। And the Lord Jesus is saying to you too, think of what He had to go through, which we ought not to ever take lightly. That His was never easy, but see what it meant, paying the “total” cost of our entire sins (not just mine and yours, but the whole world, those alive today, unborn, and those that died before we were born). And if we say we Love Him, we need to take up our cross and follow Him, with all this in mind. For indeed every set back is worth the goal in front.

It has been a week of mighty revelations. I pray that the good Lord who has chosen us to be objects of His mercy will continue to crown us with His glorious riches, in Jesus Name. Amen

Meaningless Existence

As I sit here at this desk, table, work top (whatever those around prefer to call it) I can’t help but recall to memory a feeling of waste. How am I sure that I have not wasted my youth, my life, my existence? Which immediately is followed by the ever reoccurring question / questions - why have I been cursed to exist in a form that is worthless to others? What have I been doing, done and is still doing.

I’ve been awake for two score minus eleven years, even though many a times it feels more like countless decades; but where was I? Yes, today the twenty second day, falling on the fifth day of that week and the fifth month of that year, the year I had promised myself a life of meaningful existence, saturated with pleasant memories. I’m I cursed to procrastinate and thus envy the existence of those that appear to oppress my memory living the life I ought to be living, of which I appear not to? I’m I trying to confuse myself? Yes, I was born to live the dream not dream the dream, or else why do I have the dreams, why does my memory remind me of a life unfulfilled, that is still to be attained. Surely the remembrance is not to oppress and leave me with a sense of failure! No that cannot be the case.

Still as I sit, glancing towards the left side of the room, peering through the window, into the garden encompassed with such rich luscious greenery, I really couldn’t help but say out loud I hate this life. Yes, I hate this meaningless existence that has plunged me into this parody; knowing fully well I should be living another, but not inhabiting this. I should be somewhere else not here, but where? WHERE?

I have tried with my own strength to breathe life to the dream. I have encountered obstacles. I have been told it’s no use. And I have tried to jump start it after repeated fruitless attempts; but my efforts were exercises in futility. I hate this meaningless existence. Away from me you dream of hope that has turned my once sweet rest to nightmares of sorts. I am determined to let go, and give up. I am determined to make this nightmare work. But how can I settle for this when I know I was not born for this. The belief that this is not the dream, continues to hold me ransom, I want to leave, I want to leave, but where to? WHERE TO?

There was a young man (not too long ago - just over two thousand years ago), went by the name of John. He was an only child and was born to his parents when they were well advanced in years. I was told that he spent all of his adult years (before he was killed that is) out in the wild wearing nothing but animal skin, in the HOT dry desert, parched, sweaty and exhausted. No shelter and no place to shield him from the scorching sun. Yes, where was I? And all day he would repeatedly churn out the same words – “Prepare the way of the LORD; Make His paths straight. Every valley shall be filled, and every mountain and hill brought low; the crooked places shall be made straight, and the rough ways smooth; and all flesh shall see the salvation of God.” – Luke 3:4-6. This he did without ceasing. Could you imagine how many times he would have had to say this each day, each week and each month?

I’m sure there were people his age, living suddenly, suddenly impressive lives, attaining the riches, wealth and glamour that he could easily have dreamed – which no doubt would have transformed his pitiful existence. And I’m sure there were countless others living the idea of the dream. We are told that men with more than one tunic, tax collectors, soldiers, came to seek his advice ([Luke 3:10-14] mind you these were people who came into money during his time). I’m sure there were many a time when after a packed day, exhausted and tired, he would have wondered, what manner of life is this. But we were told in Matthew 11:11a and Luke 7:28a “Assuredly, I say to you, among those born of women there has not risen one greater than John the Baptist”.

So think about it, John’s life wasn’t anything worth talking about let alone “posting on FB” – (I mean who would envy such a life. Tufiakwa not me”), yet Jesus said in his time, no one was greater than he? Now really think about it. Whose opinion of you matters the most? What do you think God is saying about your life, which apparently you’re calling meaningless and have the audacity to HATE. Think about it! How then can you say your life is worthless?

Now check this, we were also told that in that same Matthew 11:11b and Luke 7:28b “but he who is least in the kingdom of God is greater than he (i.e. John).” Which translates that even if you were a beginner in the Kingdom of God, you’re automatically greater than the Greatest, which means …….. mmhmmm, EXACTLY, OH YES, you are SUPERSTAR status. So next time, you want to say your life is meaningless, let me pose this - when did you become the creator of the Universe and have the power to REVERSE words that God has already spoken concerning you. Now, if He says, You’ve got it going on, how then can you say you haven’t. Which then leads to the second question, how then can you think that what is going on in your life this minute can be termed as a waste? Every time spent in the Lord can never be a waste. Superstars are sort after, and every minute of their lives count. So I repeat that again, your time spent in the Lord will never be a waste. Have you ever wondered how YOUR Superstar status oppresses others? It is you that is living the suddenly, suddenly impressive life..

Oh and the Dreams keep on dreaming it, as my beloved keeps reminding me, there is a time and season for everything (Ecclesiastes 3:1), and when it happens, mmhmmm it will seem like a dream J

Just in case ya’ll are wondering, I AM LIVING the DREAM.

Could it Be?

Did He not say:

“I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness. I will build you up again and you will be rebuilt, O [Lifeofastranger]. Again you will take up your tambourines and go out to dance with the joyful” – Jerimiah 31:3-4

And when it happens it will be like:

“When the Lord brought back his exiles to Jerusalem, it was like a dream! We were filled with laughter, and we sang for joy. And the other nations said, “What amazing things the Lord has done for them.” “Yes, the Lord has done amazing things for us! What joy!” – Psalm 126:1-3

Has that not been the case? Wow.

Didn’t He also say:

“He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them” – Psalm 145:19 And

“the LORD delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love” – Psalm 147:11

Yay!! I am a living Witness of the promises of God. And it’s still a dream to me. I still can’t quite believe it. But it really is happening. It is happening. The Lord who promised is able to do it. Wow Lord, really, as in it’s really happening? Be encouraged saints. What is it you have been waiting on the Lord for? Believe me He can and He will.

Is anything too Hard for the Lord? – Genesis 18:14

In Bed with the enemy

How can I forget that day! My heart aches, deeply, picking up every fragment and piece is too great a chore. I never believed this would ever happen. We are only human and thus easily fooled my brother tells me. You were my super hero, I bragged about the things I could do under your guide to whoever would ever listen. But you’ve taken that away from me. Your countless complaints, your countless moaning, your countless bickering, you’ve taken away the joy I felt just by being associated with you.

I’ve been on the road for some time now, wasted my money on things that moth can only get to, cried to my mother, how I built a case load of things and have no real bricks to show for my effort, yet you complained about the way I dressed, was it worth being called the best dresser of my time when you never took the time to find out who I was, why my hands hurt when I carry, why I no longer derive joy in building wardrobes, I guess you were never that into me, I was more of a statistics to you.

I’ve travelled long tiresome roads as I tried to make time to hang out with you; on the last journey on my way back it took me two days to get to my final destination, but you were too angry, too quick to see all that I had done wrong, too self righteous, I should have known, too angry to see how tired I was, I hadn’t slept in two days, but you were too much in a rush to break my will, to make me into the woman I was never born to be, to tell me the news I will never forget in a life time.

I hope you are happy now, I will never voice my opinion; I hope you are happy now that I feel trapped with someone I never truly knew. Even though your faults were ever so glaring, qualities I never desired in a friend, but I knew super heroes would always have a kryptonite, I guess I never believed yours would be me. That by me associating with you would bring about your destruction. I can not leave because mixing with you brought a tear to my Father’s eyes. And now… I don’t know how to leave, and I don’t want to stay. But you’re still self righteous to see what you did. What you have done to me, to us. You disgust me.

Devil, you sold my house whilst I slept, and when I had left to go to work, I came back stranded deserted all alone with nothing to call my own. I hate the fact that you did this to me. I hate the fact that I should have known sooner. I hate the fact that you hated me, but claimed it was love. I hate the fact that you’ve embarrassed me even when you were supposed to uphold me. I hate the fact that you’ve made me feel dirty and soiled. I hate the fact you’ve made me wish I should have stood on the side of my Father, instead of being pressured into yours. I hate the fact that you’ve made me disgusted when I see happy people because you led me to believe that sadness was the way. I hate the fact that whenever I see you, I see the ‘fool” I thought I knew, and believed in. How can it be? Every “blind folk” sings your praise because they think you are kind and good to all, except towards me. How could I’ve bee this blind. And for so long! This is still all a dream. Waking up, and finding that my things have been sent to my FATHER’S house. Finding that you have branded me a name, which causes me to hide myself from the public. I hope now that you have hurriedly thrown me out, you are happy now. Don’t forget what goes around comes around watch out that your actions towards me don’t heap destruction upon you. Be watchful that the hateful words you spoke concerning me and to me, don’t come back to hunt you.

I am undone…. Ermm, no I’m not.

Oh Happy Day, Oh HAPPY DAY!! Come to think of it, why did you send me packing? You saw me fraternizing with Christian folks huh? You finally realized that the lies were falling apart. You saw me inviting Jesus into my life asking Him to be My Lord and Saviour, so you decided to finish me.

Well, I’m sorry, the word of God say’s Greater is He that is me (1 John 4:4) and I’ve been created to be a light (Matthew 5:14-16), and I’m sure you know that light and darkness does not mix. Mmhmm. So you thought that your final deed will undo me. Ermm sorry to tell you, Jesus says I should take heart that He has overcome you (John 16:33), so you have wasted your time. Your attack merely pushed me across to the side of God. Oh and thanks for sending my luggage’s to my Father’s House. I guess when the Lord Jesus showed up demanding for me, you had to send me packing like the King of Egypt did to the Israelite (Exodus 12:31-33). Since you thought you were mighty and because in my ignorance I gave over myself to you, the Lord reminded you a few truths: (Isaiah 49:24-26 - “But thus says the LORD: “ Even the captives of the mighty shall be taken away, And the prey of the terrible be delivered; For I will contend with him who contends with you, And I will save your children””); and because of the finished work of Christ on the Cross, my contract with you has been nullified, so you JUST had to let me GO.

Thank you Blessed saviour, for showing up for me and giving me a Reason to live again. Thank you Lord Jesus for not leaving me at the mercy of that deceiver. I promise I’ve learnt my lesson. There is no more turning sideways for me. For I now know that there is no better way than under the Leadership of Jesus Christ.

Don’t learn lesson the hard way. I barely recovered from the clutches of that “fool” called the devil. But thank God for Jesus, for making everything New again in my life, and restoring all that was deceptively taken away from me.

Look at my Life

It was my choice to stay and wait for the Lord, not that I was simply left behind. It was my choice to stay and sit it through, not because you went ahead of me. It was my choice to understand my purpose, not to accompany you in yours. No, really it was my choice to see God through my own eyes, not to see Him through your idea of him. For indeed, I had a lesson to learn, there was no need getting the answers from your notes, after-all there is no guarantee that yours is the correct one.

I had to find out for myself.

If others were rejoicing and calling Him their Great provider (Jehovah Yireh - The LORD Who Sees/provides: (Genesis 22:14)), I needed to know what that meant to me. If others were to lift up their hands and praise Him as being their mighty warrior in battle (Elohim Tsebaoth - God of Hosts (Psa. 80:7); Jehovah Gibbor Milchamah - The Lord Mighty In Battle (Psa. 24:8)), I needed to know Him as one too in my life. If others were to testify of His faithfulness (El HaNe'eman, The Faithful God: (Deuteronomy 7:9)) in being steadfast and truthful (El Emet, The God Of Truth: (Psalm 31:6)), I too needed to know that He has shown the same to me. For through these times, I have known Him to be my light (Jehovah Ori, (Psa. 27:1) and my good shepherd (Jehovah Roi, (Psa. 23:1)). He who healed me from all of my troubles (Jehovah Rophe, (Exod. 15:26)), and because He made me (Jehovah O'saynu, (Psalm 95:6)), it is His desire for me to live a Holy life (Jehovah M'kadesh - The LORD Who Makes Holy: (Ezekiel 37:28)). And because He sees me (El Rai, (Gen. 16:13)), He is always near (Jehovah Shammah, (Ezek. 48:35)), is always with me (Immanu El, (Isaiah 7:14)), and will continue to be my helper (Elohim Ozer Li, (Psa. 54:4)). And whenever I fall short of His glory, He is there to forgive me (El Selichot - God Of Forgiveness: (Nehemiah 9:17)), for He has shown Himself to be a merciful God to me (Elohe Chaseddi, The God of My Mercy (Psa. 59:10)).

And through it all, I know now what it means to have His peace upon my life (Jehovah Shalom - The LORD Of Peace: (Judges 6:24)). For He has revealed Himself as a banner over my life (Jehovah Nissi - The LORD My Banner: (Exodus 17:15)); as my Salvation (Elohim Yish, (Psalm 18:47, 25:5)), as my fortress and Strong tower, as my God who give me Strength (Elohim Mauzi, (Psalm 43:2)), and as my God of Justice (Elohim Mishpat, (Isaiah 30:18)). Who is like You O God. Has He not been from the Beginning (Elohay Kedem, (Deuteronomy 33:27)); Is He not the Great (El HaGadol - The Great God: (Deuteronomy 10:17) I AM (Yaweh 'I AM WHO I AM Exodus 3:14-15), a Holy God (Elohim Kedoshim, (Leviticus 19:2, Joshua 24:19)), Creator of the Heaven and Earth (Elah Sh'maya V'Arah - God of Heaven and Earth: (Ezra 5:11)), the God of Gods (Elohay Elohim, (Deuteronomy 10:17)), the Living God (Elohim Chaiyim, (Jeremiah 10:10)) and who is King Forever (El Olam - The God Of Eternity (Genesis 21:33)).

Is He not God from whom all knowledge is derived from (El De'ot - The God Of Knowledge: (1 Samuel 2:3)).

I don’t know about you, but as for me, He has been my God of righteousness (Elohe Tsadeki) (Psa. 4:1)), and for all He has done and been to me, He alone is Most worthy of my Praise (Elohim Tehilati, (Psalm 109:1)). So no need to mock me or laugh at me, no point poking fun at me during my examination period, for indeed there is a time and season for everything (Ecc. 3:11), and my time to shine has come. Are You still laughing? Well are you?